Q&A: Trying to surprise my spouse

Q: Like a lot of guys, I’ve tried to surprise my wife only to have my best efforts crash and burn. I have an aversion to failure, so I’ve about decided to stop trying. Any advice before I throw in the towel?

A: Wanting to find his wife the perfect gift for her 50th birthday, a man kept hounding her for hints of what she’d like. Finally, in frustration, she told him, “I’d like something that goes from zero to two hundred in under four seconds.” Armed with that information, he bought her the most unforgettable gift she’d ever received: a brand-new bathroom scale. 

The truth is, most guys try hard – but we don’t have a clue what our ladies reallywant or need. As time passes, many couples slip into a rut of predictability. Things that used to excite and thrill don’t produce the same reaction they once did. And when a marriage becomes routine, the passion wanes, and couples can drift apart.

With this in mind, it’s important to understand that often the goal of surprising your wife is merely to find ways to keep injecting newness and freshness into your marriage. This can be as simple as trying a new restaurant — or involve a little more daring and adventure, like taking an art class together or going to an amusement park.

You don’t have to go crazy, always make elaborate plans, or spend lots of money to be spontaneous and do something unexpected. You’re only limited by your creativity (and even then there’s no shame in consulting the Internet and borrowing great ideas from others). Ultimately, your mission is to affirm your wife, remind her of your love and commitment – and have fun living life together.

For more ideas, read Great Date Ideas.

© 2018 Focus on the Family.  All rights reserved.  Used by permission.

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