“Every decision that we make comes with its consequences.”

I’m a Sabahan native, aspiring to be a lawyer. I attended the No Apologies® workshop twice – the first time when I just hit puberty and the second time when I just turned 21. For me, this workshop is one of the most important life preparatory courses, especially in the face of today’s liberal society.

The workshop taught me the truth about love and sex, and strengthened my conviction that premarital sex is wrong. Firstly, sexually transmitted diseases (STD) and pregnancy. The saying, “prevention is better than cure”, rings true here. Although STD and pregnancy are not comfortable subjects to discuss, it is important for us youngsters to be aware of these two potential consequences of premarital sex.

With the rise of feminism that advocates abortion as an expression of women’s right, premarital sex has now become increasingly acceptable. Many of my forward-thinking peers think that abstinence is “old school”, and that sexual liberty should no longer be confined within conservative thinking.

I completely disagree. Friends, what mainstream youth culture considers “cool” may not always be what is “right”.

Secondly, I believe that God made sex exclusive within the boundaries of holy matrimony. Thirdly, abstinence saves a person a whole world of complication, both emotionally and physically. Think about it: Is it not better to be patient now than regret your impulsive decision for the rest of your life?

Yes, I agree that everybody has the freedom to choose how to live their lives. However, with freedom comes responsibility. Every decision that we make comes with its consequences. Thus, I believe that saying no to premarital sex is a decision that comes with the most guilt-free consequence.

Finally, a hasty marriage due to a premarital pregnancy may well lead to a broken marriage as it doesn’t have a firm foundation. And we know that broken marriages cause social upheaval.

For these reasons, I remain among those who stand against the current of modern liberal society, and am convinced that sexual intercourse is a pleasure only rightfully enjoyed within a marriage.

The No Apologies® workshop has changed my perspective (and life) about love and sex. Not everybody is as positive as I am. Nevertheless, it is better to have a room full of rebellious, free-thinking teens getting educated (probably against their will) about premarital sex than a room full of broken and remorseful parents and children.

— Feisan Villana Minin

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